Aurangzeb: Senapati batao ki hum
Shivaji ko kyun nahi dhund pa rahe hain?

Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mooghal (Mughal) hain Google nahi..

76

English |

jokes.jpg

Cricketer ka beta: Arre dekho maa..
papa sixer per sixer maare jaa rahe hain!!
Maa: Beta theek se dekho..
advertisement hoga.

20

Hindi

A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

11

English |

Itne kamzor ho gaye hum aapki judaai se..
Itne kamzor ho gaye hum aapki judaai se..
ek din machchar bhi le gayaa,
uthaa ke razaai se!!

54

Hindi

Anaath Ashram Manager to Bania:
Sethji, aap hamare anaath ashram ke liye kya kar sakte ho ?

Funny Bania: Mein anaath ashram mein apne Char bachhe bhej sakta hu.

- Hemant Singh

70

Hindi |

Doctor paagal se: Yeh chithi tum kise likh rahe ho..?
Paagal: Apne aap ko.
Doctor: Achcha isme kya likha hai.
Paagal: Maalum nahi.
Doctor: Kyu..?
Paagal: Abhi mujhe mili kahaan hai..!

123

Hindi

A stranger to a child: Beta, itni chocolate khaoge to bimaar ho jaoge!
Bachcha: Mere dadaji 100 saal jiye thhe.....
Stranger: Vo chocolate khate thhe?
Bachcha: Nahi vo apne kaam se kaam rakhte thhe....

- Vidhi

121

Hindi |

Ek ladka gadhe ke samne gir gaya.
Ek khubsurat ladki ne dekha aur kaha:
Apne bade bhai ke pair chhu rahe ho..?
Ladka: JI BHABHI JI..

103

Hindi |

If doctors start making films
titles wud be:
kabhi funsi..kabhi jakham
hum blood de chuke sanam
maine mbbs kyon kiya
ab tumhaare hawaale operation saathiyon
humaara stethoscope aapke paas hai
mujhe kuch kaatna hai
kaho na bukhaar hai
appendix mil gaya
kal patient ho na ho.

63

Hindi

If a Fat Girl is waiting for bus at bus stop
what will you call her in One Word..?
Answer - MotiVating..

43

Hindi |

A lady was driving for the first time on a highway.
Her husband called on her cellphone -
Be careful Honey, it's coming on radio that
somebody is driving on the wrong side of the road.
Lady replied - Somebody..?
Those stupids are in hundreds..

20

English |

Pathan - Moulvi sahab, wazu ke baghair namaz ho jaati hai?
Moulvi - Nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai.
Moulvi - Bhai, nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai, maine khud padh kar dekhi hai..

14

Hindi |

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