Jokes Quotes

A real story from Konni, Pathanamthitta, Kerala:
A BPL family got water connection. Everyone was happy . The tap never gave any water after initial testing but after 3-4 months a bill of Rs. 480/- came in June 2024. The poor widow lady went to the local water office to complain that she had received a water bill showing meter reading zero. She also told authorities that being a BPL family she was told that no water bill will come.

The officials told her that her connection is yet to be converted to BPL and thus she has to pay the bill. They told that the connection will be converted to BPL in January 2025. Further, they directed her to an engineer. The engineer confirmed that as the water tank is still under construction so no water has been supplied to her as reflected in zero meter reading.

The lady asked them that she wants to surrender the water connection to which the officials told her that then she needs to pay panchayat penalty for agreeing to a water connection and then surrendering it. They told her that they will temporarily disconnect the connection but in case the meter reading will reflect any usage then she will face water theft charges.

Har Ghar Jal or Har Ghar Bill?
#HarGharJal #JalJeevanMission #jalshaktiabhiyan #jalshakti

Ladki pataane ka tarika:
Chupke se uske peeche jaa kar use daraao.
Agar woh hasi to samjho pat gai..
Agar gussa hui to zor-zor se chillao,
Didi darr gayi..Didi darr gayi..

Ek ladka gadhe ke samne gir gaya.
Ek khubsurat ladki ne dekha aur kaha:
Apne bade bhai ke pair chhu rahe ho..?
Ladka: JI BHABHI JI..

God made each and everyone of us unique
until he got to China.
Copy paste.. copy paste..

If doctors start making films
titles wud be:
kabhi funsi..kabhi jakham
hum blood de chuke sanam
maine mbbs kyon kiya
ab tumhaare hawaale operation saathiyon
humaara stethoscope aapke paas hai
mujhe kuch kaatna hai
kaho na bukhaar hai
appendix mil gaya
kal patient ho na ho.

Doctor paagal se: Yeh chithi tum kise likh rahe ho..?
Paagal: Apne aap ko.
Doctor: Achcha isme kya likha hai.
Paagal: Maalum nahi.
Doctor: Kyu..?
Paagal: Abhi mujhe mili kahaan hai..!

Aurangzeb: Senapati batao ki hum
Shivaji ko kyun nahi dhund pa rahe hain?

Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mooghal (Mughal) hain Google nahi..