Teacher: (1)There is a frog, (2)Ship is sinking,
(3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg. Then, what is my age..?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know..?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

71

English |

Teacher: Tum bade hokar kya karoge?
Student: Shadi karunga.
Teacher: Nahi, mera matlab hai kya banoge?
Student: Dulha banunga.
Teacher: Oh ho! Papa tumse kya chaahte hain?
Student: Pota.
Teacher: Hey Bhagwaan! abey zindagi ka kya maksad hai?
Student: Hum do, humaare do.

184

Hindi

Teacher: Why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor..?
Student: You told me to do it without using tables.

43

English |

Teacher: Late kyun aaye?
Kid: Mummy papa ki ladaai ho gayi.
Teacher: To late kyun hue?
Kid: Mera ek joota mummy ke paas tha aur
dusra papa ke paas..

130

Hindi

Principal: Late kyun aaye?
Student: Bike broke down.
Principal: Bus mein nahi aa sakte the?
Student: Maine bola tha sir,
par aapki beti ke nakhre bade hain..

61

Hindi

Exam model by years:
1998: Answer all questions.
2005: Answer any five questions.
2008: Write either A or B.
2015: Only read questions.
2020: Thanks for coming.

171

English

Two commerce students talking

X- oh sorry yaar heard about your breakup... :(

Y- yup

X- You must be sad na..

Y- No yaar. We are commerce students!

I have kept 1 gf as reserve for doubtful debts..

- Tarun Goma

131

English |

Kaash koi exam result ka insurance karwaa deta,
to har exam ke pehle premium bharwaa dete,
paas hote to theek,
warna insurance claim karwaa lete..

151

Hindi

Paying money for other's mistake
will happen only in..
.
.
School, College, University in the name of
Re-valuation..

52

English |

Teacher: (1)There is a frog, (2)Ship is sinking,
(3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg. Then, what is my age..?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know..?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

71

English |

Height of Challenge
In an exam a student just writes one line
leaving the rest of the answer sheet blank:
Pass me, if you have can.

72

English

Teacher: Pappu I will give u a tight slap,
if u continue ur Non serious Behavior in the class.
Pappu: Thappad se dar nahi lagta madam
payar se lagta hai.

73

Hindi

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