Santa ki wife kidnap ho gayi.
Kidnapper ne finger ka tukda bheja aur paise mange.
Santa : Ungali to kisi ki bhi ho sakti hai, Mundi bhej Mundi....

00

Hindi |

Teacher: You know, you can't sleep in my class.
Santa : I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could..

00

English |

Santa car mein battery lagwaane gaya.
Mechanic ne poocha: Exide ki laga du?
Santa sochne laga, fir bola: Baar-baar kaun aayega,
Dono side ki laga de..

00

Hindi

Santa in a Bank Test..
Q: What is a Cyclone?



Santa answers: "It is the smallest Loan given by a Bank to purchase a cycle....!"

00

English |

एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!

- Hemant Singh
22

Hindi |

Santa was sitting and thinking hard.
Preetoji: Kya soch rahe ho ji?
Santa : Yeh TV waalo ko kaise pataa chal gayaa?
Preetoji: Kya?
Santa : "Aap dekh rahe hain STAR PLUS."

00

Hindi

Santa ek jyotish ke paas kundali (horoscope) dikhaane gaya.
Jyotish: Tera naam Santa hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tujhe 2 ladki aur 1 ladka hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tune abhi 10 kg rice khareede hain.
Santa : Maharaj ki jai ho.
Jyotish: Bewakoof ! Kundali dikha, Ration Card nahi..

10

Hindi |

Santa to nauker: Ped-podho ko paani daal de.
Nauker: Saabji, baahar to baarish ho rahi hai.
Santa : Abey paagal, to chattri le ke daal de!

01

Hindi

Santa in london went to hotel to eat chicken.
He forgot the english name.
Waiter: What do you like to have, sir?
Santa : Egg's mother..

10

English

As pilots, Santa and Banta were trying to land an airplane.
They start descending and as they touch the ground Santa screamed:
"Get the airplane up, the runaway is ending...".
Banta swiftly gets the plane back up in the air...

They make a big turn and start descending again.
The moment they touch the ground, Santa screamed again
"Get the plane up, the runaway is ending...".
Banta swiftly gets the plane back up in the air...

They make a big turn and start descending again...
This goes on again and again...

During their fourth descent Santa says:
"Look at those stupid people,
they build this huge & expensive airport
but with such a short runaway...",
"I know" answers Banta, "But look how wide they made it...."

10

English |

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