A man goes skydiving.
After a fantastic free fall he pulls the rip cord to open his parachute
but nothing happens. He tries everything but can't get it open.

Just then another man flies by him, going UP.
The skydiver yells, "Hey, you know anything about parachutes?"
The man replies, "No, you know anything about gas stoves?"

01

English |

funny.jpg

A innocent Dhamki:
As the thief was leaving the house,
the kid woke up and said,
"Mera school bag bhi le kar jaao..
warna main mummy ko uthaa doonga."

42

Hindi

Lalooji ek mahina bush se
english ki training le kar aaye.
Ek din ek phone aaya to lalooji bole:
"Who iz ispeaking?"
Jawaab aaya:
"Hum sasoora BUSHWAA..!!"

20

Hindi

Ek chota bachha road par potty kar raha tha.
Police ne use pakad liya.
Jab use le jaane lage to bachha bola,
"O Kanoon k rakhwalo, saboot to utha lo."

30

Hindi

Lucknow me 2 bache ladh rahe the.
1st : Dekhiye ager aap humari baat nahi manenge
to hum aapki walida mohtarma ki shaan me
gustakhana Kalimat pesh kar denge.
2nd: Huzur phir hum bhi aapke
rukhsaar mubarak pe aisa tamacha raseed karenge ki
gaal mubarak gulab ki maanind chamak uthega.

20

Urdu

A small boy wrote letter to Shivji:
Oh my dear God , please give me a bicycle.
One week passed. Usko cycle nahi mili.
Tab usne Ganesh ji ki moorti dekhi aur
use apne ghar le aaya.
Again he wrote a letter..
Mr Shivji, aapka beta mere kabze mein hai,
agar beta chaahiye to give me a bicycle in 24 hours..

10

Hindi

A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station..

00

English |

Ek ladka - larki hotel main gaye
Waiter: Kya loge?
Larki: Sabjiyo wali gujiya.
Waiter: What ?
Ladka: Yeh momos mang rahi hai.

63

Hindi |

Bholu: Pandit ji meri shaadi nahi ho rahi hai..koi upaaye bataao..
Pandit ji: Kaise hogi bhai..?
Kundli mein sukh hi sukh likha hai, mauj karo..!!

23

Hindi |

Ye Mera New No. Hai - 9953723352.

Plz save kar lena..
Or Haan ek baat suno...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
Maze ki baat to dekho purana bhi yahi hai..

- Vikas Umrao
81

Hindi |

Ek poet garibi se tang aa kar daku ban gaya.
Daketi karne ek bank gaya aur kaha:
Arz hai..
Taqdeer mein jo hai wahi milega
Hands-Up, koi apni jagah se nahi hilega..
Fir cashier se kaha..
Kuch khwaab meri aankhon se nikaal do
jo kuch bhi tumhaare paas hai jaldi se is bag mein daal do..
Bahut koshish karta hun teri yaad bhulaane ki
koi koshish na kare police ko bulaane ki..
Bhula de mujhko kya jaata hai tera
main goli maar doonga jo kisi ne peecha kiya mera..

67

Hindi

Every tear is a sign of-
Onions,
Every silence is a sign of-
Zero balance,
Every smile is a sign of-
Daily brushing..
LIFE is simple
Don't make it complex..

00

English |

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