Raj: Meet my wife Divya.
Sunil: Oh! i know her.
Raj: Know her..How?
Sunil: We'd been sleeping together.
Raj: What the hell..
Sunil: 10 years ago..in the history class.

110

English

Father: Tere result da ki baniya..?
Son: Dr. sahib da munda fail ho gaya.
Father: Te tera result..?
Son: Headmaster sahib da munda v fail ho gaya.
Father: Tu apna te dass.
Son: Khanna sahib da munda v fail hai.
Father: Kanjra tera result ki hai..?
Son: Tussi kehra bill gates ho, tuhada munda v fail ho gaya..

150

Punjabi

Teacher To Boy: Ek Taraf bhains Hai,
ek Taraf Dimag. Kya Loge?
Boy: bhains
Teacher: Galat. Agar Mai Hota To Dimag Leta.
Boy-Jiske Pas Jo Nai Hai Vo Wahi Lega na.

160

Hindi

Father: What were the two hardest things
you learnt in the college..?
Son: Opening beer bottles with teeth &
lighting 10 cigarettes with onle one match stick..

54

English

Teacher: Tum bade hokar kya karoge?
Student: Shadi karunga.
Teacher: Nahi, mera matlab hai kya banoge?
Student: Dulha banunga.
Teacher: Oh ho! Papa tumse kya chaahte hain?
Student: Pota.
Teacher: Hey Bhagwaan! abey zindagi ka kya maksad hai?
Student: Hum do, humaare do.

174

Hindi

Teacher: Why do you always get so dirty..?
Kid: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

43

English |

Einstein
.
.
Newton
.
.
Maxwell
.
.
Faraday
.
.
Kirchoff
.
.
.
These are the people
whose 10 minute enjoyment wasted our childhood..

52

English |

Teacher: (1)There is a frog, (2)Ship is sinking,
(3)potatoes cost Rs 3/kg. Then, what is my age..?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know..?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

71

English |

Teacher: Pappu I will give u a tight slap,
if u continue ur Non serious Behavior in the class.
Pappu: Thappad se dar nahi lagta madam
payar se lagta hai.

73

Hindi

Teacher: Which was the first silent film in english?
Tintu: If the film was silent, How could U know it was english?

130

English

Teacher:
" I love You"
ki khoj kahan hui?
Boy: China mein..
Teacher: Kyu?
Boy: Kyuki iski na koi warranty hai aur na koi guaranty.
Chale to chaand tak, na chale to shaam tak..

- Tarun Goma

174

Hindi |

Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,
but also admitted it.
So do you know why his father didn't punish him?
Student: Because George still had the axe in his hand.

51

English |

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