I may be fat, but you're ugly - I can lose weight..!

10

English |

funny.jpg

A small boy wrote letter to Shivji:
Oh my dear God , please give me a bicycle.
One week passed. Usko cycle nahi mili.
Tab usne Ganesh ji ki moorti dekhi aur
use apne ghar le aaya.
Again he wrote a letter..
Mr Shivji, aapka beta mere kabze mein hai,
agar beta chaahiye to give me a bicycle in 24 hours..

10

Hindi

TT : BABA, kaha jaoge?
Sadhu : jaha Ram ka janma hua tha.
TT : Ticket dikhao
Sadhu : nahi he
TT : To chalo
Sadhu : kaha?
TT : Jaha Krishna ka janma hua tha..

40

Hindi

Couple silent in bed.
Wife thinks:
Why is he not talking to me?
Is he thinking of another woman ?
Does he like someone else?
Is he seeing someone?
Don't I appeal to him anymore?
Are wrinkles showing on my face?
Is he trying to dump me?
Is he now finding me ugly?
Have I put on weight?
Does my make up repel him these days.
Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinking: Damnit man, Dhoni se kuch nahi ho Sakta, aur yeh Gautam gambhir..

11

Hindi

Ek bewafa ki khatir humne jam utha liya....

Fir..

Fir kya..

bread pe lagaya or kha liya!!

Moral: Sabi ashik sharabi ni hote kuch BHUKHE bhi hote hain..

20

Hindi |

At Traffic Signal Boy Friend to Girl Friend :
Jaan main tumhari aankhon main sara jahan dekh sakta hu.
Pass me ek ladka without helmet khada tha.
Yeh sunte hi bola: Bhai sahab, mujhe sirf itna bata do ki
Aage chaurahe par Helmet ki checking ho rahi hai ya nahi..

- Hemant Singh
32

Hindi |

Principal: Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya to fine dena hoga.
1st time: 100 Rs.
2nd time: 200 Rs.
3rd time: 300 Rs.
Munna bhai interrupts n says:
ae maamu, monthly paas kitne mein hai..?

31

Hindi

Young generation ko sabse zada tention kab hoti hai???
Jab wo so kar uthe or unka mobile mummy k pas ho..
mummy hum sirf dost hain!

20

Hindi

Harbhajan Singh started bhangra
on the score of 33.
Sachin: Why are you dancing..
it's not a 50 or 100 yet..?
Bhajji: Only a punjab board student
can understand the value of 33!

02

English

Doctor paagal se: Yeh chithi tum kise likh rahe ho..?
Paagal: Apne aap ko.
Doctor: Achcha isme kya likha hai.
Paagal: Maalum nahi.
Doctor: Kyu..?
Paagal: Abhi mujhe mili kahaan hai..!

123

Hindi

Recommended for You »

  1. Life Is At Its Weakest When There Are More Doubts Than ..
  2. Tujhe Ye Shauq Ke Mohabbat Ki Bheekh Mangoon Main Meri Ye ..
  3. 👬 दोस्ती होती है – *One Time* 🙃 हम निभाते है ..
  4. A Real Story From Konni Pathanamthitta Kerala A BPL Family Got ..
  5. Moving Vehicles Will Stop Some Time But May Your Winning Spirit Achieve ..
  6. Laziness Is Our Biggest Enemy Jawahar Lal Nehru We Should ..
  7. Khubsurat Hain Woh Lab Jinse Dusro Ke Liye Dua Nikalti Hai ..
  8. Most People Are Other People Their Thoughts Are Someone Else S Opinions Their ..
  9. Celebrate The Victory Of The Force Of Good Over Evil ..
  10. My Wife Dresses To Kill She Cooks The Same Way ..

Share & Let Everyone Read









Draw shape below and click submit button to send us your message:
आओ खेलें

लाल बूढ़क्की छू..

anagram quiz

About Us


Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.

The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..



What's more


moderated-content-kids-safe

Moderated Content

Safe for people of all Age Groups including Children.
sms-api-always-win

API

Display SMS on your Website or Blog at Zero Cost.
rate-content

SMS Rating

Gives You Power to Rate Content.
« Stay In Touch »

Quality Improvement Initiative

Quality Improvement Program

On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.

Sample thumb screenshot

You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.