Santa Was Filling A Slambook. He Didn't Knew The Meaning Of Quotes

Santa was filling a slambook.
He didn't knew the meaning of Zodiac sign.
He turned the previous page and
saw that somebody had written Cancer,
so he wrote Gas Problem..

Santa ek jyotish ke paas kundali (horoscope) dikhaane gaya.
Jyotish: Tera naam Santa hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tujhe 2 ladki aur 1 ladka hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tune abhi 10 kg rice khareede hain.
Santa : Maharaj ki jai ho.
Jyotish: Bewakoof ! Kundali dikha, Ration Card nahi..

Santa ne apni nayi girlfriend k
kandhe pe 1st time hath rakha aur
bahut dhire se nervously bola: "I love u"
Girlfriend-"zor se Bolo''
Santa -"JAI MATA DI"

Santa opens the door of his car,
when suddenly another car came along
and hit the door,
ripping it off completely.
Santa to Police Officer: Look what they've done to my Car! He whined.

"You are so materialistic, you make me sick!", retorted the officer.
"You're so worried about your car,
that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!"

"Oh no!", replied Santa ,
finally noticing the bloody left shoulder where his arm once was.
"Where's my Rolex..?!"

Santa kudi nu: Ki tu meri valentine banengi..?
Kudi: Eh jutti vekhi hai..?
Santa : Marjaaniye, main Romeo-Juliet banaan nu firdaa,
sittu mochi di daastaan nahi.

Santa and Banta bought a horse each.
Santa : How will we know which is your & which is mine?
Banta: Easy, I'll cut mine's tail, yours will be the one with tail.

This was heard by a few boys, they cut the other's tail too.
Next morning the confusion continued.
Banta: Don't worry, I'll tie a bell around its neck, yours will be the one without the bell.

The boys heard this also & cut the bell. The next day, Banta got frustrated & said
"Okay now the last criterion, white will be yours & black will be mine."

Santa ki ladaai apne baapu se ho gayi
to usne apne baapu ki photo kabristan me ek ped pe latka dee
aur niche likha “Coming Soon”..