Saddam(Narak mein): Yamraaj ji, mujhe pakistan baat karni hai.
Yamraaj: Karlo.
After the call..
Saddam: Kitne rupae hue..?
Yamraaj: Narak to narak calls free hain.

72

Hindi

jokes.jpg

A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

11

English |

Soldier: Sir, i want 1 week leave to go home.
Senior: I will give you one month leave if you will caught enemies tank.

After some time.
Soldier: Sir, i have caught the enemies tank, it is standing outside.
Senior (astonished): Great! How did you managed that.
Soldier: Sir, when enemies soldiers need leave
they also borrow tank from us.

32

English |

Engg. Student: Sir humne aisi cheez banayi hai jisse hum
deewar ke us paar bhi dekh sakte hain.....

Sir: Wow, fantastic! Kya hai woh?

Student:
Suraakh.......

- Vikas Umrao
83

Hindi |

Doctor paagal se: Yeh chithi tum kise likh rahe ho..?
Paagal: Apne aap ko.
Doctor: Achcha isme kya likha hai.
Paagal: Maalum nahi.
Doctor: Kyu..?
Paagal: Abhi mujhe mili kahaan hai..!

123

Hindi

Na jaane woh humse kya chupaati thi,
kuch tha uske honto pe magar na jaane kyon sharmaati thi,
jab humne muh khulwaa ke dekha..
to pataa chalaa..
woh to gutkha khaati thi!!

134

Hindi

मैं गया उसकी गली में
बोला दिल से दिल लगा लो
जब देखा उसकी मम्मी को
तो बोला जूते - चप्पल ठीक करा लो ..

Main gaya uski gali mein
bola dil se dil laga lo
jab dekha uski mummy ko
to bola joote-chappal theek kara lo..

118

Hindi |

Teacher to Banta: Tell me five animals living in water?
Banta: Frog.
Teacher: Theek hai, hor das?
Banta: Frog da peo, ohdi maa, behen te wotti..

113

Punjabi

Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.

146

Hindi

A man gave advt. in matrimonial column:
"PATNI CHAHIYE"
He got several replies saying:
"MERI LE JAA"

52

Hindi

A guy walks into work with both of his ears bandaged up.
His boss asks, "what happened to you?"
The man replies "I was ironing my clothes
when my phone rang and
I accidentally answered my iron."
His boss then says "Well, that explains one ear,
what about the other one?"
The man says "Well, I had to call the doctor!"

25

English |

Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..

91

Hindi

Recommended for You »

  1. Meri Khamoshi Ko Galat Rang De Kar Ik Shaks Mujhe Shehar ..
  2. Maine Kaha Dilruba Usne Kaha Ice Cream Khilaa Maine Kaha Paise Nahi Usne Kaha ..
  3. Laal Gulaabi Rang Hai Jhoom Rahaa Sansaar Hai Suraj Ki Kirne Khushiyon ..
  4. If Each Day Is A Gift I Would Like To Know ..
  5. Replace Your Toothbrush Before It Becomes SunFlower ..
  6. Wise People Can’t Answer The Most Foolish Questions ..
  7. A King Who Keep All Resources With Him And Does Not ..
  8. Two Persons Are Drowning In A River One Is Whom You ..
  9. Memories Play A Very Confusing Role They Make You Laugh When ..
  10. Every New Day Is A New Chapter Of Life Bringing New ..

Share & Let Everyone Read









Draw shape below and click submit button to send us your message:
आओ खेलें

लाल बूढ़क्की छू..

anagram quiz

About Us


Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.

The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..



What's more


moderated-content-kids-safe

Moderated Content

Safe for people of all Age Groups including Children.
sms-api-always-win

API

Display SMS on your Website or Blog at Zero Cost.
rate-content

SMS Rating

Gives You Power to Rate Content.
« Stay In Touch »

Quality Improvement Initiative

Quality Improvement Program

On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.

Sample thumb screenshot

You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.