Teacher to Banta: Tell me five animals living in water?
Banta: Frog.
Teacher: Theek hai, hor das?
Banta: Frog da peo, ohdi maa, behen te wotti..

113

Punjabi

jokes.jpg

A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.

A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.

At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"

21

English |

Dhirubhai calling from heaven ..
Beta mukesh apna reliance INDIA moblie kaisa chal raha hai..?
Mukesh: Papa, kuch sunaai nahi de rahaa hai,
aap mere Idea waale number per call karo.

72

Hindi

If doctors start making films
titles wud be:
kabhi funsi..kabhi jakham
hum blood de chuke sanam
maine mbbs kyon kiya
ab tumhaare hawaale operation saathiyon
humaara stethoscope aapke paas hai
mujhe kuch kaatna hai
kaho na bukhaar hai
appendix mil gaya
kal patient ho na ho.

63

Hindi

Ek ladka gadhe ke samne gir gaya.
Ek khubsurat ladki ne dekha aur kaha:
Apne bade bhai ke pair chhu rahe ho..?
Ladka: JI BHABHI JI..

103

Hindi |

A lady was driving for the first time on a highway.
Her husband called on her cellphone -
Be careful Honey, it's coming on radio that
somebody is driving on the wrong side of the road.
Lady replied - Somebody..?
Those stupids are in hundreds..

20

English |

Ek Chinti aur Haathi ko Prem ho gaya..
Chinti ke Maa-Baap ne Shaadi se inkar kar diya..
Reason poocha to kaha:
Ladke ke daant Baahar hai!!

82

Hindi

In court Judge to Lady:
You are really very brave, Daaku ko bahut maara tumNe.
Lady: Mujhe kya pata daaku tha,
main samjhi mere pati ghar dair se aaye hain.

50

Hindi |

Funny Slogans
RTO - Donate blood, but not on road.
Forest Deptt. - Shoot birds with camera,
not with guns.
Kingfisher - Fly with us, not on plane,
but with Beer..

31

English |

Ek aadmi ki 6 ungaliyaan thi,
usse log hanuman bulaate the,
bataao kyon??
Kyonki
uska naam hanuman tha..!!

93

Hindi

A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

11

English |

Attachment is not when two people chat day & night..
its when someone e-mail u and adds an image or data file with it..

- Gajendra Gupta
20

English |

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