14Pathan - Moulvi sahab, wazu ke baghair namaz ho jaati hai?
Moulvi - Nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai.
Moulvi - Bhai, nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai, maine khud padh kar dekhi hai..
Hindi |
76Aurangzeb: Senapati batao ki hum
Shivaji ko kyun nahi dhund pa rahe hain?
Senapati: Kyunki Maharaj hum Mooghal (Mughal) hain Google nahi..
English |
50In court Judge to Lady:
You are really very brave, Daaku ko bahut maara tumNe.
Lady: Mujhe kya pata daaku tha,
main samjhi mere pati ghar dair se aaye hain.
Hindi |
11A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"
English |
72Saddam(Narak mein): Yamraaj ji, mujhe pakistan baat karni hai.
Yamraaj: Karlo.
After the call..
Saddam: Kitne rupae hue..?
Yamraaj: Narak to narak calls free hain.
Hindi
53Patient: Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai
uske haath lagte hi main theek ho gaya.
Doctor: Jaanta hun,
chaante ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi.
Hindi
121A stranger to a child: Beta, itni chocolate khaoge to bimaar ho jaoge!
- Vidhi
Bachcha: Mere dadaji 100 saal jiye thhe.....
Stranger: Vo chocolate khate thhe?
Bachcha: Nahi vo apne kaam se kaam rakhte thhe....
Hindi |
83Engg. Student: Sir humne aisi cheez banayi hai jisse hum
- Vikas Umrao
deewar ke us paar bhi dekh sakte hain.....
Sir: Wow, fantastic! Kya hai woh?
Student:
Suraakh.......
Hindi |
01A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".
English |
146Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.
Hindi
81Ye Mera New No. Hai - 9953723352.
- Vikas Umrao
Plz save kar lena..
Or Haan ek baat suno...
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Maze ki baat to dekho purana bhi yahi hai..
Hindi |
21Don’t steal, don’t lie and don’t cheat.
- Vidhi
The government hates competition..
English |
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