00Santa went to doctor to loose weight.
Doctor: If you will run eight kilometers a day for 300 days, you will loose 34 kilos.
At the end of 300 days,
Santa called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
Santa : I'm 2400 kms from home..
English |
00Tutor: Write ur father's name in english.
Santa wrote "Beautiful Red Underwear"
Tutor saw and asked - Are u mad or what?????
Santa : No, his name is Sunder Lal Chadda.
English
10Santa joined Army, given ak-47, puzzeled Santa asks Major,
"Sir, is bandook ki nali saamne rakhun ya ulta?"
Major: Kisi bhi tarah rakho, faayedaa desh ka hi hoga.
Hindi
00Santa and Banta bought a horse each.
Santa : How will we know which is your & which is mine?
Banta: Easy, I'll cut mine's tail, yours will be the one with tail.
This was heard by a few boys, they cut the other's tail too.
Next morning the confusion continued.
Banta: Don't worry, I'll tie a bell around its neck, yours will be the one without the bell.
The boys heard this also & cut the bell. The next day, Banta got frustrated & said
"Okay now the last criterion, white will be yours & black will be mine."
English |
21Santa sookhe taalaab mein boat chala raha tha.
Banta: Aise logo ne hi humaara naam kharaab kar rakha hai,
agar mujhe tairna aata to wahi jaa kar maarta saale ko..
Hindi
10Kaale Badal chaaye hoye c te sante nu apni gf to thappar pe gaya...
Kyon?
.
.
Kyoki ohne gana gata
"Aaj din chadya tere rang varga"..
Punjabi |
01Santa and Banta were playing chess.
Santa : Let's wrap up.
Banta: Yeah, anyways just your rook
and my knight are left..
Then Vishwanathan Anand comes there.
VA: Come, let's play chess.
Santa -Banta: No way, you will beat us.
VA: Ok.. You both can play as a team.
Santa -Banta: Still we will lose.
VA: Ok, i will play with left hand.
Santa -Banta: Yeah, then it's fine.
Obviously, Santa Banta lost the game and VA leaves.
Santa : It was shameful, he beat us even with left hand.
Banta: He fooled us.
Santa : How?
Banta: He must be left-handed.
English |
20Santa was filling a slambook.
He didn't knew the meaning of Zodiac sign.
He turned the previous page and
saw that somebody had written Cancer,
so he wrote Gas Problem..
English
00Santa : Mobile mein recharge kar do.
Shopkeeper: Kitne ka..?
Santa : Rs. 10 ka.
Shopkeeper: 7 rs. ka talktime milega.
Santa : Koi gal nahi, 3 rs. da ''BHUJIA'' de do..
Hindi |
00Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes.
He got irritated..
drank poison and said
Now bite, u'll die bastards..
English
00Santa dials a number and a girl receives his call-
Santa : Who's this?
Girl: Main Sita.
Santa : Navaa seaapaa, main taan ludhiyaane keeta si,
eh taan ayodhya mil gayaa.
Hindi
00Santa proposed a girl.......
Girl: I am one year elder to u.
Santa : Oye, no problem sohniye, I will marry u next year.
English
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