A Sardaar made a call to airport and
asked how long is the journey
from Punjab to America..
Receptionist: One second, sir.....
Sardaar: Thank you.

20

English

Santa : Yeh kela kaise diya?
Pundit: 1 rupee.
Santa : 60 paise ka deta hai?
Pundit: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka doonga.
Santa : Le 40 paise, chilka rakh ke sirf kela de de.

10

Hindi

Teacher: If I give you two rabbits, and two rabbits and two more rabbits then
how many rabbits you will be having..?
Santa : Seven.
Teacher: Oh! Listen carefully.
If I give you two rabbits, and two rabbits and two more rabbits then
how many rabbits you will be having..?
Santa : Seven.
Teacher: Ok. Let me ask you
If I give you two chocolates, and two chocolates and two more chocolates then
how many chocolates you will be having..?
Santa : Six.
Teacher: Good. Now tell me
If I give you two rabbits, and two rabbits and two more rabbits then
how many rabbits you will be having..?
Santa : Seven.
Teacher: How is that..?
Santa : I am already having one at home.

20

English |

Teacher: What is the difference between a radio and a newspaper..?
Santa : Newspaper mein tandoor ki rotiyan daal sakte hain, radio mein nahi..

10

Hindi |

How a romantic jatt will propose a girl?????
Teri boothi local bus wargi, mera ticket kataaun nu jee kardaa,
teri tor ni sohniye meri majh vargi, mera sangal paun nu jee kardaa.

20

Punjabi

Hindi teacher asks Santa : Kaal kitne prakaar ke hote hain?
Santa : O G 7 prakaar ke -
1. Local kaal
2. STD kaal
3. ISD kaal
4. Missed kaal
5. Received kaal
6. Dialled kaal aur
7. Sat Sri Akal

51

Punjabi |

How did Santa tried to kill a bird..?
He took it to the top of a building &
dropped it from there to die..

10

English

Santa went to doctor to loose weight.
Doctor: If you will run eight kilometers a day for 300 days, you will loose 34 kilos.
At the end of 300 days,
Santa called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
Santa : I'm 2400 kms from home..

00

English |

Santa ped pe chada to upar baithe bandar ne poocha: Upar kyon aaye ho?
Santa : Apple khane.
Bandar: Yeh to aam ka ped hai.
Santa : Pata hai, apple saath laya hoon..

00

Hindi |

Captain of military: Naujawaan, aage badho.
Ek sardaar aage nahi badhta.
Captain: Tum aage kyon nahi badhaa, jawaan.
Sardaar: Aapne kaha 9 jawaan aage badho,
main 10ve number per hun.

20

Hindi

Santa : Hello, Apollo Hospital.. My friend Banta has got an Hear Attack.
Receptionist: Sir, what's your location.
Santa : Chandni Chowk, near Sunehri Masjid .
Receptionist: Can you spell that..?
Santa : After a pause, How about I take him to India Gate and
you can pick him from there..?

10

English |

Aurato se Bhari bus ka Accident ho gaya.
Sari Ladies mar gayi.
Sbke pati 1-1 ghante roye
santa akela pura din Roya..
Q.??

Kyonki uski patni ki Bus Chhoot gyi thi
No jokes pls.
Aaj santa serious hai.

20

Hindi |

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