Don’t Steal, Don’t Lie And Don’t Cheat. The Government Hates Competition.. Quotes

Don’t steal, don’t lie and don’t cheat.
The government hates competition..

A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane.

Teacher to Banta: Tell me five animals living in water?
Banta: Frog.
Teacher: Theek hai, hor das?
Banta: Frog da peo, ohdi maa, behen te wotti..

Two hikers were walking through the woods when
they stumble upon a bear.
They immediately take off running, and
the first hiker says to the other:
Do you think we can actually outrun this bear?
The second hiker replies:
I don't have to outrun the bear,
I only have to outrun you..

Ek conductor ki shadi ho rahi thi,
jab Dulhn phero ke waqt uske paas aa kar baithi to woh bola,
"Thoda paas ho ke baith, ek sawari aur baith sakti hai."

Anaath Ashram Manager to Bania:
Sethji, aap hamare anaath ashram ke liye kya kar sakte ho ?

Funny Bania: Mein anaath ashram mein apne Char bachhe bhej sakta hu.

Sheher ki gali mein paan ki dukan
Devdas ne dekhi Paro ki muskan
Devdas ne khilaya Paro ko paan
Khaa ke paan Paro boli "Shukriya Bhaijaan"..