Santa Returns Book To Library, Bangs It On Table & Quotes

Santa returns book to library, bangs it on table & says - What a shit..?
"I read the whole book, too many character, no story at all"..?
Librarian: So, you are the one who took the Telephone Directory..

One afternoon, Banta came to Santa 's home.
Santa : Chalo dinner karte hain
Banta: Par abhi to dopeher hai aur dopeher ko to lunch karte hain..?
Santa : Oh yara khana to kal raat waala hi hai na..

3 chor Billu, Sonu aur Santa
Police se chhup ke 3 boriyon me ghus gaye.
Police wala aaya, usne pehli bori mein laat maari.
Billu: BOW-BOW.
Police wala: Kutta hai.
Dusri bori mein laat maari.
Sonu: MIAUU.
Police wala: Billi hai.

Teesri bori mein laat mari.
Koi aawaz nahi aayi.
Fir mari.. Koi awaz nahi..
20-25 laat mari to andar se Santa chillaaya:
Abe metric fail, AALOO kabhi bolta hai kya..

मंगल ग्रह पर पानी मिलने की खबर सुन कर
संता नासा फ़ोन करता है .
संता : ओ जी यह मंगल पर पानी मिल गया आपको ..?
नासा : यस
संता : ओ जी मुबारक हो जी..इक्क बोतल पानी चाहिदा सी
नासा : सॉरी , वी कांट गिव
संता : ओह ले ..इतना पैसा खर्चा करके
पानी भी ढून्ढ लित्ता है ते दे वी नहीं रहे
बन्दा धोने क्या मंगल पे जाएगा ..

Mangal greh par paani milne ki khabar sun kar
Santa NASA phone karta hai.
Santa : O ji yeh mangal par paani mil gaya aapko..?
NASA: Yes
Santa : O ji mubaarak ho ji..Ikk botal paani chaahida si
NASA: Sorry, we can't give.
Santa : Oh le..itna paisa kharchaa karke
paani bhi dhoond litta hai te de v nahi rahe
banda dhone kya mangal pe jaayega..

Santa ki girlfrnd romantic mood me...
Aaj mere ghar koi nahi hai.. Aa jao..!!
Santa - tu mere ghar aaja,
mere ghar sab log hai,
Tera man lag jayega...!!

Sardaarji aapko logo ne kyon maara..?
Sardaar: Arrey yaar meri photo bus mein gir gayi thi.
Maine kaha, madam zaraa saree upar karna,
mujhe photo leni hai.

Santa : Mujhe shadi mein BMW mili hai..!
Banta: Par tumhare pass toh koi car nahi hai..?
Santa :Abe gadhe, BMW ka matlab
Bahut Moti Wife ..