Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..

91

Hindi

jokes.jpg

Teacher to Banta: Tell me five animals living in water?
Banta: Frog.
Teacher: Theek hai, hor das?
Banta: Frog da peo, ohdi maa, behen te wotti..

113

Punjabi

If doctors start making films
titles wud be:
kabhi funsi..kabhi jakham
hum blood de chuke sanam
maine mbbs kyon kiya
ab tumhaare hawaale operation saathiyon
humaara stethoscope aapke paas hai
mujhe kuch kaatna hai
kaho na bukhaar hai
appendix mil gaya
kal patient ho na ho.

63

Hindi

Ladki ek aisi paheli hai,
kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai,
kharchaa karo to bole- Darling, I love u..
na karo to bole- Bhaiya, who r u..?

4830

Hindi

A stranger to a child: Beta, itni chocolate khaoge to bimaar ho jaoge!
Bachcha: Mere dadaji 100 saal jiye thhe.....
Stranger: Vo chocolate khate thhe?
Bachcha: Nahi vo apne kaam se kaam rakhte thhe....

- Vidhi

121

Hindi |

Joe: We will soon become rich.
Jill: How?
Joe: Tomorrow my mathematics teacher will teach me
how to convert paisa into rupees.

140

English

A lady was driving for the first time on a highway.
Her husband called on her cellphone -
Be careful Honey, it's coming on radio that
somebody is driving on the wrong side of the road.
Lady replied - Somebody..?
Those stupids are in hundreds..

20

English |

A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane.

15

English |

Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.

146

Hindi

If a Fat Girl is waiting for bus at bus stop
what will you call her in One Word..?
Answer - MotiVating..

43

Hindi |

Ladki pataane ka tarika:
Chupke se uske peeche jaa kar use daraao.
Agar woh hasi to samjho pat gai..
Agar gussa hui to zor-zor se chillao,
Didi darr gayi..Didi darr gayi..

102

Hindi

In court Judge to Lady:
You are really very brave, Daaku ko bahut maara tumNe.
Lady: Mujhe kya pata daaku tha,
main samjhi mere pati ghar dair se aaye hain.

50

Hindi |

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