10Couple in theatre:
Husband : Darling, mujhe to tumhaari aatma se pyaar hai,
tumhaara jism to main kutton ko daal dun!!
Santa sitting on back seat: BHOW BHOW..BHOW BHOW..
Hindi
00Santa ki ladaai apne baapu se ho gayi
to usne apne baapu ki photo kabristan me ek ped pe latka dee
aur niche likha “Coming Soon”..
Hindi |
20Banta send sms to Santa : Bhejne wala mahan,
padhne wala buddhu.
Santa got angry and replied: Bhejne wala budddhu,
padhne wala mahan.
Hindi |
00Santa & Banta were crossing river on a boat.
Banta - Hey ! this boat is sinking.
Santa - Doobne de yaar, kaun si apni hai..
Hindi |
20A Chinese was in a hospital.
Santa went to meet him.
Chinese said CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA & died.
Santa went china to know the meaning, that was:
You are standing on the Oxygen pipe..
English |
10Santa , aapko logo ne kyon maara?
Santa : Arre yaar meri photo bus mein gir gayi thi.
Maine kaha Madam zaraa saaree upar kijiye, photo leni hai.
Hindi
00Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes.
He got irritated..
drank poison and said
Now bite, u'll die bastards..
English
20Santa Junior: Mummy, kal raati jado main
bathroom da darwaaja kholeyaa te light aape hi jag pai.
Mummy: Oye Khoteyaa, tu fer fridge wich susu kar ditta..
Punjabi
31Santa apne baap ki death par bahut roya.
Fir uski sister ka phone aaya.
Phone sun kar Santa aur bhi rone laga.
Logon ne poocha kyon ro rahe ho..?
Santa : Meri bhen da vi abba mar gaya hai.
Hindi |
20Teacher: How many planets are there?
Santa : Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, ...wagerah...wagerah...
Teacher: Aur batao?
Santa : Aur bas sab badhiya! Mata rani ki kirpa hai. Aap sunao.
Hindi
10A man and a woman were fighting
on a railway station.
The lady: Ye jhaadoo dekhi hai,
ek doongi aur seedha canada pahunchega.
Santa , who was just passing by, also heard this and
immediately came to the lady,
Santa : Madam ji, jhaadoo ki kuch tillein mujhe bhi de do,
mujhe Jalandhar jaana hai.
Hindi |
10Santa : Ek chor ne mujhe chaku dikha ke lut liya,
Banta: Tere paas to hamesha gun hoti hai..?
Santa : Haan.. 2 lakh ki hai
maine chupaa li thi varna woh bhi le jaata..
Hindi |
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