Valentines Special

GF = Where R u.?
BF = I'm At "Bank"

GF = I Need 10,000 For New Cell Phone & 5,000 For New Dress.

BF = Sorry, I Mean I'm At BL00D BANK

"KHOON PIYEGI KHOON":p:D

- Tarun Goma
42

Hindi |

jokes.jpg

Hansa: AUTOMATICALLY matlab?
Praful: Jab auto mein baith kar koi ladki ganji ho jaaye
to usko kehte hain,
AUTO-MEIN-TAKLI!!!

32

Hindi

Salesman cheerfully greeted
the person entering showroom.
Salesman - Sir, May I help you.
Man - Ahmm..
Salesman - Sir, we have got fresh arrivals
and are offering 10 percent discount.
Man - But..
Salesman - Sir, you can also avail
extra benefits by joining our loyalty program.
What would you like to have Sir.
Man - My dog.

21

English |

Ek Chinti aur Haathi ko Prem ho gaya..
Chinti ke Maa-Baap ne Shaadi se inkar kar diya..
Reason poocha to kaha:
Ladke ke daant Baahar hai!!

82

Hindi

A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"

Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".

01

English |

Ek aadmi STD shop per phone karne jaata hai
aur STD waale ko 2 thappad maarta hai. Kyon..?????
Kyonki STD shop ke baahar likha tha,
dial karne se pehle 2 lagaayein.

146

Hindi

God made each and everyone of us unique
until he got to China.
Copy paste.. copy paste..

40

English |

A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says, "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses."
The woman answered, "Well, I have contacts."
Policeman: "I don't care who you know! You're getting fined!"

11

English |

Endegi kutahtar az an ast ke be khosumat bogzarad va ghalbha

geramitar az anand ke beshkanand.

farda tolu khahad kard, hata agar ma nabashim.
pas biaeid karte sukhteman ra be yekdigar bedahim!

- Mukhtar

01

Persian |

Customer: Waiter, do you serve pigs..?
Waiter: Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

31

English |

Engg. Student: Sir humne aisi cheez banayi hai jisse hum
deewar ke us paar bhi dekh sakte hain.....

Sir: Wow, fantastic! Kya hai woh?

Student:
Suraakh.......

- Vikas Umrao

83

Hindi |

Teacher to Banta: Tell me five animals living in water?
Banta: Frog.
Teacher: Theek hai, hor das?
Banta: Frog da peo, ohdi maa, behen te wotti..

113

Punjabi

Recommended for You »

  1. Friendship Is Not Finding Gold Or Silver Among The Rocks Of ..
  2. Ancient Egyptian Proverb Do Not Drink Water In The House Of ..
  3. Fight Fire With Fire ..
  4. A Good Programmer Is Someone Who Looks Both Ways Before Crossing A ..
  5. Wife Aap Salim Ki Biwi Ke Janaaze Mein Kyun Nahi ..
  6. Saade Rang Ko Galti Se Aap Naa Kora Samjho Isi Mein ..
  7. Shattering Hearts Is Easy Even Idiots Can Do That ..
  8. Kuch Sangdil Log Aur Unki Ruswai Main Fir Wahi Faka Masti Nashee N ..
  9. Age Wrinkles The Body Quitting Wrinkles The Soul Douglas MacArthur ..
  10. Muskaan Aapke Honto Se Kahi Jaaye Na Aansoo Aapki Palko Pe ..

Share & Let Everyone Read









Draw shape below and click submit button to send us your message:
आओ खेलें

लाल बूढ़क्की छू..

anagram quiz

About Us


Our logo expands to iOLdot - Ik Oankaar Lazeez Dimension of Texting which tries to reflect our ideology.

The purpose of this website is to develop a Dimension to Texting through the Aesthetics of Words by providing Unique, Decent, Pleasant, Pure, Gentle, Clean, Refined, Inoffensive Thought Provoking Wisdom Quotes, Funny Jokes, Shayari, Motivational SMS, Greetings, Wishes, Proverbs, Dohe, Love Messages & much more.. We also encourage you to be part of this journey & share your creative content with us. Play your flute here..



What's more


moderated-content-kids-safe

Moderated Content

Safe for people of all Age Groups including Children.
sms-api-always-win

API

Display SMS on your Website or Blog at Zero Cost.
rate-content

SMS Rating

Gives You Power to Rate Content.
« Stay In Touch »

Quality Improvement Initiative

Quality Improvement Program

On September 13, 2015 we took an initiative towards delivering high quality content. With every Lazeez SMS you will find two thumbs - one for upvote and one to downvote.

Sample thumb screenshot

You can cast your vote simply by clicking on the thumb icon.