Two Astrophysicists Are Discussing Their Research In A Bar One Quotes

Two astrophysicists are discussing their research in a bar one evening
when a drunk who has been sitting and listening in at the next seat
turns and says, in a very worried voice,
"What was that you just said!!??"

"We were discussing stellar evolution, and I said to my colleague here
that the Sun would run out of nuclear fuel and turn into a red giant
star in about 5 billion years, possibly melting the Earth."

"Whew!!," says the drunk,
"You really had me worried. I thought you said 5 million."

Age of Drinks:
1 to 3: Milk
3 to 8: Cerelac
9 to 13: Horlicks
14 to 25: Beer
26 to 40: Old Monk
41 to 60: Tonic
After 60: Anytime "Gangajal"

Jab koi itna khas ban jaye
uske baare mein sochna ehsas ban jaye
to maang lena khuda se use zindagi bhar ke liye
isse pehle ki uski MAA kisi aur ki SAAS ban jaye..

Hum gaye unki gali mein,
bole dil se dil laga lo,
jab dekha uski mummy ko to bole..
Joote, chappal theek kara lo.

Maine poocha chand se ke dekha hai khain
mere yaar sa hasin
chaand ne kaha abey paagal
itni unchaai se kuch dikhaai deta hai kya..

Population control slogan in Bihar:
hum do, humaare do,
unke baad jitne bhi ho,
sabko delhi bhej do.....

संता की मौत बिजली गिरने से हो गई
पर उसकी लाश मुस्कुराते हुए मिली
भगवान ने पुछा ऐसा क्यों ?
संता - मैनु लगा जी कोई फोटो खींच रहा है ..

Santa ki maut bijli girne se ho gai
par uski laash muskuraate hue mili
Bhagwan ne poocha aisa kyun?
Santa - Mainu laga ji koi photo kheench raha hai..