Two Astrophysicists Are Discussing Their Research In A Bar One Quotes

Two astrophysicists are discussing their research in a bar one evening
when a drunk who has been sitting and listening in at the next seat
turns and says, in a very worried voice,
"What was that you just said!!??"

"We were discussing stellar evolution, and I said to my colleague here
that the Sun would run out of nuclear fuel and turn into a red giant
star in about 5 billion years, possibly melting the Earth."

"Whew!!," says the drunk,
"You really had me worried. I thought you said 5 million."

Jab koi itna khas ban jaye
uske baare mein sochna ehsas ban jaye
to maang lena khuda se use zindagi bhar ke liye
isse pehle ki uski MAA kisi aur ki SAAS ban jaye..

Apni Girlfrnd ke samne dusri ladkiyo ko kaise dekhe.. ??
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.
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Boy: Tum ne us ladki ko dekha....
Wo Kapde usko bilkul suit nehi karte.....
.
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Girl: Saale.... Tu toh chahta hai k
ladkiyan kapde hi na pehne !!
.
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Moral: Ladki Ne Pehle Hi Sprite Pee li thi.. :P

A kind word and gun gets you more than a kind word alone.

Dhirubhai calling from heaven ..
Beta mukesh apna reliance INDIA moblie kaisa chal raha hai..?
Mukesh: Papa, kuch sunaai nahi de rahaa hai,
aap mere Idea waale number per call karo.

Judge: Sach-sach batao tumne apni biwi per haath kyun uthaaya..?
Mulzim: 3 baaton ki wajah se
1. Uska chehra meri taraf nahi tha
2. Uske haath mein belan nahi tha
3. Aur sabse badi wajah,
mere bhaagne ke liye darwaaza khula tha..

A cute question:
Kid: Mom, kya aapne mujhe paida hone se pehle dekha tha..?
Mom: Nahi to.
Kid: To phir paida hone ke baad pehchana kaise..?