30Banta and his wife waiting for the train..
itne mein Punjab Mail aayi.
Banta bhaag kar train mein chadtaa hai and says to her wife
Jab Punjab Female aaye tab tu bhi aa jaana.
Punjabi
22एक बार संता अपनी पत्नी जीतो के साथ कॉफी पीने जाता है और
- Hemant Singh
दो हॉट कॉफी ऑर्डर करता है,
कुछ देर बाद जैसे ही वेटर कॉफी लेकर आता है तो संता, जीतो से कहता है:
संता: ओ जीतो जल्दी-जल्दी कॉफी पी ले अगर ठण्डी हो गई तो फ़ालतू में ज्यादा पैसे देने पड़ेंगे!
जीतो: क्यों क्या हुआ? मुंह जलवाने से तो अच्छा है कि, यह थोड़ी ठंडी हो जाए उसके बाद पिएं!
संता: पागल तूने इनकी रेट लिस्ट नहीं देखी, हॉट कॉफी 15 रुपए और कोल्ड कॉफ़ी 45 रुपए की है!
Hindi |
20Santa : Jab me chota tha to ek baar kutub minaar se gir gaya tha.
Banta: Acha!! to mar gya ya bach gya.
Santa : Saale.! mujhe kya pata, me to chota tha...
Hindi |
00Government promised jiske 5 bachche hain oose ghar degi.
Santa ke 3, usne Wife se kaha: Padosan ke 2 bhi mere hain,
unko lata hun.
Lane ke baad:
Santa : Apne 3 kaha gaye?
Wife : Jinke the woh le gaye.
Hindi
10Santa ek jyotish ke paas kundali (horoscope) dikhaane gaya.
Jyotish: Tera naam Santa hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tujhe 2 ladki aur 1 ladka hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tune abhi 10 kg rice khareede hain.
Santa : Maharaj ki jai ho.
Jyotish: Bewakoof ! Kundali dikha, Ration Card nahi..
Hindi |
10Teacher: What is the difference between a radio and a newspaper..?
Santa : Newspaper mein tandoor ki rotiyan daal sakte hain, radio mein nahi..
Hindi |
20Santa : Jab main mar jaun to samne waali family ko jaroor bulana.
Banta: Kyon..?
Santa : Unke ghar ki ladies murde ko japhian paa-paa kar roti hain..
Hindi |
00Santa was commiting suicide.
Banta: Ki hoya?
Santa : Yaar, meri biwi bhaag gayi mere dost ke saath.
Banta: To tu doosri shaadi kar le, suicide kyon?
Santa : Oye banteyaa main apne dost ke bina nahi reh sakta.
Hindi
30Santa baar-baar zebra crossing per idhar udhar chal raha tha,
woh kya soch raha hoga?????
"Yeh Piano saala bajta kyon nahi.......???"
Hindi
02Driver: Sir, which way to turn, left or right?
Santa : Jaha se tyre puncture ho jaaye ya gaadi kharaab ho jaaye.
Driver: Kya keh rahe ho sir..?
Santa : Haan, tabhi to main paise kam doonga.
Hindi |
00Kid : I need a burger.
Santa : But that's stale roti.
It becomes puffy as it expires..
English |
20Santa Junior: Mummy, kal raati jado main
bathroom da darwaaja kholeyaa te light aape hi jag pai.
Mummy: Oye Khoteyaa, tu fer fridge wich susu kar ditta..
Punjabi
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