A innocent Dhamki:
As the thief was leaving the house,
the kid woke up and said,
"Mera school bag bhi le kar jaao..
warna main mummy ko uthaa doonga."

42

Hindi

funny.jpg

A carpenter was working on a building.
He was on the second story using an electric saw,
when he accidentally saws off one of his ears.
He looks down on the ground and,
in hopes of finding his ear and
having it sewn back on,
calls to the men working below.
"Hey, do any of you guys see an ear down there?"

One of the men glances around, then yells up,
"Hey buddy! Is this it?"

Carpenter: "No, mine had a pencil behind it!"

01

English |

A lady asks a pandit: Ghar ki sukh-shanti ke liye kaun sa vrat rakhun..?
Padit: Moun Vrat..

00

Hindi |

Santa ek jyotish ke paas kundali (horoscope) dikhaane gaya.
Jyotish: Tera naam Santa hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tujhe 2 ladki aur 1 ladka hai.
Santa : Ji Maharaj
Jyotish: Tune abhi 10 kg rice khareede hain.
Santa : Maharaj ki jai ho.
Jyotish: Bewakoof ! Kundali dikha, Ration Card nahi..

10

Hindi |

Father to son: Sharmaji ki ladki ko dekha hai,
woh exam mein first aai hai.
Son: Usi ko to dekhta tha,
tabhi to fail ho gaya.

196

Hindi

ਨਿਕੰਮੀ ਔਲਾਦ ਦੀ ਜਿੰਨੀ ਘੱਟ ਸੇਵਾ ਕੀਤੀ ਜਾਏ
ਘਰ ਉੰਨਾ ਜ਼ਯਾਦਾ ਤਰੱਕੀ ਕਰਦਾ ਹੈ ..

337

Punjabi |

9 arab 89 crore
10 lakh 69 thousand
and 004.
Daro mat, yeh mera bank balance nahi
mobile no. hai..!!

21

Hindi

Hurry Now Samsung Galaxy Grand Quattro with quad-core processor
free with just One kg rice.!
Price of One kg rice is Rs. 17290..

00

English |

Young Harold was late for Sunday-school and
the minister inquired the cause.
"I was going fishing, but father wouldn't let me,"
announced the lad.
"That's the right kind of a father to have," replied the reverend gentleman.
"Did he explain the reason why he would not let you go..?"
"Yes, sir. He said there wasn't bait enough for two."

01

English |

The clergyman on his vacation wrote a long letter
concerning his traveling experiences to be circulated among
the members of the congregation.
The letter opened in this form:
"Dear Friends:
"I will not address you as ladies and gentlemen,
because I know you so well."

10

English |

Teacher: Beta, bataao to "TAMSO MAA JYOTIR GAMAYA" shlok ka kya arth hai?
Student: Tum so jaao maa, main JYOTI ke paas jaa rahaaa hun....

41

Hindi

Pokémon Go
Look up, away from your phone and
both ways before crossing the street..

00

English |

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