31A baniya boy on date with his girlfrnd.
On coming back home,
His dad: Kitne rupye kharche?
Son: 500
Dad: (angrily) 500?
Son: Haa! wo itne hi leke aayi thi.
Hindi
23Premi apni premika ki zulfon me aisa khoya
ki Behosh ho gaya.
Jab hosh aaya to Romantic ho kar pucha
Nahati kyu nahi hai?
Hindi
65Before Marriage
Roses are red, Sky is blue,
U r beautiful,
I luv u.
After Marriage
Roses are dead, i have flu,
Don't get on my head,
side ho Tu..
Hindi |
10Age of Drinks:
1 to 3: Milk
3 to 8: Cerelac
9 to 13: Horlicks
14 to 25: Beer
26 to 40: Old Monk
41 to 60: Tonic
After 60: Anytime "Gangajal"
Hindi
9230Ek baba roz gurdware kirtan krda c,
Roz ek budhi lal suit pa ke aundi c,
Baba us nu pyaar krda c.
Ek din oh budhi nahi aayi
te baba kirtan krda kenda "sab sangta ayiea gi saade LAL nazar nai aaunde"
ose wele oh budhi HARA suit pa ke a jandi e.
Baba bolan lag pya 'mann shetal ho gya gi vekh k sangta Harian-bharian..
Punjabi
32At Traffic Signal Boy Friend to Girl Friend :
- Hemant Singh
Jaan main tumhari aankhon main sara jahan dekh sakta hu.
Pass me ek ladka without helmet khada tha.
Yeh sunte hi bola: Bhai sahab, mujhe sirf itna bata do ki
Aage chaurahe par Helmet ki checking ho rahi hai ya nahi..
Hindi |
219 arab 89 crore
10 lakh 69 thousand
and 004.
Daro mat, yeh mera bank balance nahi
mobile no. hai..!!
Hindi
10Class ki Group Photo dekhte hue Teacher bacchon se kehne lagi:
Jab tum log bade ho kar yeh photo dekhoge to kahoge,
Yeh Raju hai jo America chala gaya...
Yeh Chandu hai jo London chala gaya..
aur yeh pappu hai jo wahi ka wahi reh gaya..
Pappu gusse se bola: "Aur yeh humaari Teacher hain
jinka dehant ho gaya.."
Hindi |
20Solid Beijjati:
- Tarun Goma
Ek Doctor ne naya clinic khola.
Thodi daer baad ek Aadmi aaya.
.
Doctor ne apne aap ko busy show karne ke liye, telephone ka receiver uthaya aur
appointment dene ke andaz me bolne laga.
.
Fir phone rakne ke baad...
Doctor Aadmi se: Haan bataiye kya hua?
.
.
.
Aadmi: BSNL se aaya hun,
telephone activate karne ke liye.
Hindi |
11Well I have a microphone
and you don't
so you will listen to every damn word
I have to say!
- Adam Sandler
English |
00A hair in the head is worth
two in the brush..
English |
20Inerviewer: What is recession?
Candidate: When 'Wine & Women' get replaced by
'Water & Wife ' that critical phase of life is called recession.
English
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