00Fatherhood is great because
you can ruin someone from scratch.
- Jon Stewart
English |
01A man goes skydiving.
After a fantastic free fall he pulls the rip cord to open his parachute
but nothing happens. He tries everything but can't get it open.
Just then another man flies by him, going UP.
The skydiver yells, "Hey, you know anything about parachutes?"
The man replies, "No, you know anything about gas stoves?"
English |
85Na Dekh Aasman ko itni Hasrat se..
ae insaan
Kisi Parindey ne Muh pe Potty Kar Di toh Sari Hasrat Nikal Jayegi..
Urdu |
10Apni Girlfrnd ke samne dusri ladkiyo ko kaise dekhe.. ??
- Tarun Goma
.
.
.
.
Boy: Tum ne us ladki ko dekha....
Wo Kapde usko bilkul suit nehi karte.....
.
.
.
.
.
Girl: Saale.... Tu toh chahta hai k
ladkiyan kapde hi na pehne !!
.
.
Moral: Ladki Ne Pehle Hi Sprite Pee li thi.. :P
Hindi |
20Solid Beijjati:
- Tarun Goma
Ek Doctor ne naya clinic khola.
Thodi daer baad ek Aadmi aaya.
.
Doctor ne apne aap ko busy show karne ke liye, telephone ka receiver uthaya aur
appointment dene ke andaz me bolne laga.
.
Fir phone rakne ke baad...
Doctor Aadmi se: Haan bataiye kya hua?
.
.
.
Aadmi: BSNL se aaya hun,
telephone activate karne ke liye.
Hindi |
10Class ki Group Photo dekhte hue Teacher bacchon se kehne lagi:
Jab tum log bade ho kar yeh photo dekhoge to kahoge,
Yeh Raju hai jo America chala gaya...
Yeh Chandu hai jo London chala gaya..
aur yeh pappu hai jo wahi ka wahi reh gaya..
Pappu gusse se bola: "Aur yeh humaari Teacher hain
jinka dehant ho gaya.."
Hindi |
00Two astrophysicists are discussing their research in a bar one evening
when a drunk who has been sitting and listening in at the next seat
turns and says, in a very worried voice,
"What was that you just said!!??"
"We were discussing stellar evolution, and I said to my colleague here
that the Sun would run out of nuclear fuel and turn into a red giant
star in about 5 billion years, possibly melting the Earth."
"Whew!!," says the drunk,
"You really had me worried. I thought you said 5 million."
English |
12Two sardaars were talking.
1st: Is Harbhajan Singh, the cricketer, male or female?
2nd: Female.
1st: How?
2nd: Just now the commentator told a wonderful delivery by him.
English
15A mosquito cried out in pain:
"A chemist has poisoned my brain!"
The cause of his sorrow
was para-dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane.
English |
20Judge: You are crossing the limits.
Lawyer: Kaun saala aisa kehta hai..?
Judge: How dare you call me saala..?
Lawyer: My Lord, I said kaun ‘Sa Law’ aisa kehta hai..?
Hindi |
51Ek conductor ki shadi ho rahi thi,
- Tarun Goma
jab Dulhn phero ke waqt uske paas aa kar baithi to woh bola,
"Thoda paas ho ke baith, ek sawari aur baith sakti hai."
Hindi |
10Ameer ka bachcha-Papa aj bohot garmi he!
Papa:Hum aaj he A/C lagwa lenge!
Gareeb ka bacha-PAPA aj kitni garmi h!
PAPA:Chal tujhe Ganja karwa deta hu.
Hindi
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