70Sheher ki gali mein paan ki dukan
Devdas ne dekhi Paro ki muskan
Devdas ne khilaya Paro ko paan
Khaa ke paan Paro boli "Shukriya Bhaijaan"..
Hindi |
121A stranger to a child: Beta, itni chocolate khaoge to bimaar ho jaoge!
- Vidhi
Bachcha: Mere dadaji 100 saal jiye thhe.....
Stranger: Vo chocolate khate thhe?
Bachcha: Nahi vo apne kaam se kaam rakhte thhe....
Hindi |
72Dhirubhai calling from heaven ..
Beta mukesh apna reliance INDIA moblie kaisa chal raha hai..?
Mukesh: Papa, kuch sunaai nahi de rahaa hai,
aap mere Idea waale number per call karo.
Hindi
22Kashmir ki romantic waadiyon mein,
barfeeli hawaaon mein,
jheel ke kinaare baithe Raanjhe ko
Heer ne kya kahaa..??
Ve moeyaa Hero na ban..
Sweater pehen le.
Hindi
21A very wealthy old man was dying and summoned his lawyer, his Priest, and his Doctor.
As his final and last wish, he gave each 2,50,000 in cash. He said he wanted to prove that you "could" take it with you when you die. He requested that each one of them throw the cash in his grave just before they shoveled the dirt in.
A few days later at the funeral the Priest walked up to the grave after the Eulogy and with tears in his eyes , tossed the money into the grave. Shortly after, the Doctor also did the same. Last the lawyer came and tossed in an envelope.
At the family gathering, or wake if you will, the Priest walked up to the Doctor and the lawyer and said, "I must confess, I kept out 25,000 of his money for the orphanage". With that the Doctor also confided that he too kept out 50,000 for the new Medical Clinic for the poor. The lawyer then exclaimed, "Shame, shame on you both!, I gave him a check for the entire amount!"
English |
63If doctors start making films
titles wud be:
kabhi funsi..kabhi jakham
hum blood de chuke sanam
maine mbbs kyon kiya
ab tumhaare hawaale operation saathiyon
humaara stethoscope aapke paas hai
mujhe kuch kaatna hai
kaho na bukhaar hai
appendix mil gaya
kal patient ho na ho.
Hindi
01A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martin us.
"You mean a martini?" the bartender asks.
The Roman replies,
"If I wanted a double, I would have asked for it!"Details:
Most words that end in "us" are pluralized by changing the "us" to "i"
(e.g. cactus - cacti, genius - genii, Stimulus - stimuli) and most of those words have Latin roots. So the Latin scholar thinks of "martini" as being plural, so he singularises it by calling it a "martinus".
English |
91Patient to Doctor:
Aapne nurse bahut achchi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gayaa.
Doctor: Jaanta hun..
thappad ki aawaaz mujhe bhi sunaai di thi..
Hindi
52A man gave advt. in matrimonial column:
"PATNI CHAHIYE"
He got several replies saying:
"MERI LE JAA"
Hindi
25A guy walks into work with both of his ears bandaged up.
His boss asks, "what happened to you?"
The man replies "I was ironing my clothes
when my phone rang and
I accidentally answered my iron."
His boss then says "Well, that explains one ear,
what about the other one?"
The man says "Well, I had to call the doctor!"
English |
14Pathan - Moulvi sahab, wazu ke baghair namaz ho jaati hai?
Moulvi - Nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai.
Moulvi - Bhai, nahi hoti.
Pathan - Ho jaati hai, maine khud padh kar dekhi hai..
Hindi |
130What is attitude ..?
Three ants saw an elephant coming.
1st ant - We'll kill him.
2nd ant - We'll break his legs.
3rd ant - Leave him dude, he's alone,
and we r three.. that won't be fair.
English
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